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Episode Cheatsheet: Finding the Right Therapist: A Practical Guide
With Katherine Seldin, PhD, Postdoctoral Fellow at University of Illinois, Chicago 3 min read
Brady Dowling
April 11, 2025
In this insightful conversation, Dr. Katherine Seldin demystifies the therapy experience from start to finish. Drawing from her expertise in emotional impulsivity, mood disorders, and digital interventions, she provides practical guidance on finding the right therapist, what to expect during sessions, and how to know when therapy is working. Dr. Seldin emphasizes that while some form of therapy could benefit everyone, the key lies in finding the right fit between client needs and therapeutic approaches. Whether you're considering therapy for the first time or looking to restart your mental health journey, this episode offers valuable perspectives on making therapy work for you.
Key Insights
The therapeutic alliance (the chemistry and trust between client and therapist) is one of the greatest predictors of success in therapy
Different challenges often warrant specific therapeutic approaches - for example, CBT for insomnia or exposure and response prevention for OCD
Things often feel worse before they feel better in therapy - like deep cleaning a room, you need to "kick up the dust" inside yourself before true progress occurs
Telehealth has dramatically increased access to specialized care, allowing people to connect with experts regardless of geographic limitations
A proper goodbye in therapy can be healing, especially for those who have experienced difficult endings in other relationships
Quotable Moments
"It's not because therapy doesn't work, it's because the fit that that person had maybe wasn't the best for them."
"A metaphor that I like to use sometimes is if you've got a messy home or a messy room and you're trying to clean it up, in order to deep clean, you've got to take things out from underneath the cabinets... It's going to look a lot worse than when you started. But then if you can stay in there long enough to put the room back together, you'll notice that you're in a better spot than when you started."
Action Steps
Research Therapists Strategically: Use resources like psychologytoday.com, insurance websites, or directories from professional associations (ACBT, ACBS) to find therapists with expertise relevant to your specific challenges.
Understand Credentials: Familiarize yourself with common therapist credentials like LCSW (Licensed Clinical Social Worker), LMFT (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist), PhD, or PsyD to help guide your selection process.
Prepare for Initial Discomfort: Recognize that therapy often feels worse before it feels better, and commit to pushing through this initial phase if you trust your therapist.
Ask Direct Questions: Don't hesitate to ask about your therapist's experience with your specific challenges, their treatment approach, or how they're conceptualizing your situation.
Consider Alternatives: If traditional talk therapy doesn't feel right, explore mindfulness practices, meditation groups, or strengthening your social support network as complementary approaches.
Resources Mentioned
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia (CBTI)
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)
Listen to the full episode:
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